Thursday, May 5, 2011

Exposing Myself? Would That Be Such a Bad Thing?

Well work was a really interesting today. From the sound of crickets chirping due to the slowness of sales in retail to people watching all the downtown nutjobs, today would have been like any other day working in a high end retail establishment. Then a weird thing occurred that brings me to writing this blog. I ALMOST BECAME A REGISTERED SEX OFFENDER! Yes, you heard me right. I almost became that blue dot on sex offender websites living in surburbia! Who knows? I could have been living near you and you wouldn't have known it. Muhahahaha!

Let me explain. Today began like any typical day from dealing with customers to doing your normal office work. It's all in a day's work as a retail service counter employee until I felt need to drain the lizard. Perhaps it was my mistake of downing the industrial size can of Red Bull that did me in. I'll know not to repeat that same mistake twice. As I was saying, I had to take a leak. I excused myself and left the department to trek down to the men's restroom on the other side of the store.

It was at that moment that I opened the door a crack that a wave of surrealism hit me. The men's restroom was invaded by women. Two women in fact. Apparently, the cleaning ladies were making the the female restroom all nice and pretty that these two chicks felt the need to duck into the men's to do their business. However instead of hurrying out, they took their precious time fixing themselves, their hair, make-up, and hooker wear to look presentable in the store. Embarrassed, I fould myself at a loss for words, shut the door, and quickly rushed down to perform number one in the men's restroom downstairs.

Now what surprised me is how nonchalant these two little girls were about their willingness to share the restroom with a male. Sure, this happens frequently in a club or bar but in broad daylight of a store? Seriously, I pondered for moment to fuck all protocol and piss in the urinal while farting in their direction but then I probably be arrested for indecent exposure and have to explain the blue dot scenario to my family and friends. If only I could get away with it? Hmmmmm, it really makes you think.

Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Myspace Can Suck It!

Well Myspace has finally done it! It has now become the bottom of the barrel of social networking sites. It has become another Friendster. After nearly a decade of being the main center of connecting to the world, it has decided to resort to alienating long time users with the dreaded 3.0 upgrade. What is 3.0, you say? It is just another fancy way of trying to hip and cool like Facebook. In truth, Myspace fails miserably and will never top Facebook's audience.

Now I too have Facebook account and I have a close connection to family and friends so that is where I keep the two seperate. Myspace became my go to place for blogging since it had a really cool blogging features and made me part of a community of creative writers. From creative writing, daily ramblings, and humorous anecdotes it gave me a forum to write and speak my mind without any limits. 3.0 has taken that away from me.

The appearance of this new Myspace I can't stomach. The navigational features are horrendous! Blogging, editing, and posting graphics are a nightmare! THIS IS AN ABSOLUTE TRAVESTY! I hate this new upgrade with a passion! For now I'm waiting this out until my current blog group who I adore choose a good location to house a new writing group (hopefully Blogger). As for Myspace, they can suck it! I no longer care to put much effort there and I'll laugh while their loyal long term subscribers run off for the hills because of their ridiculous need to compete with Facebook!

Friday, July 30, 2010

Potlucks Are a Pot of Gold

So my favorite manager just had her secretive birthday just past last week. I can't really blame her for not wanting to share. I keep telling everyone that age is just a number but in truth it is simply some cruel way of telling yourself you're getting older. My fellow co-worker is organizing a secretive potluck which is great if we're feeding a starving third world country but murder on staying to my healthy eating plan. Fuck it! I say bitch I'm hungry! I'm bringing in sushi from Sushi Deli. That is sort of healthy in a carb and natural seafood way. I'm going to have to pull a two hour workout to achieve this one.

Friday, July 23, 2010

Welcome to Blogger!

So I've tried and failed at doing my weightloss blog for here so I thought I would go back to my usual journal writing. The whole point of this site is for me to practice my writing skills if I'm ever going to have the balls to send something off to publisher. Hence, I've come up with the random thoughts bit just to get pen to paper, hands to keystroke, and finger to throat for regurgitation (if I was bullimic and I'm not. Okay it was bad joke) I definitely missed writing so here goes nothing!